Not sure what to call this…

Lots of feelings I experienced as a child still affect me today. I get sensitive when I feel:





Those are the major ones, the doozies. They create this sickening, hot, weak feeling in the pit of my stomach. My heart feels heavy, a lump forms in my throat and my eyes get watery. And suddenly I am five again, and I am not enough. I am in the way. No one hears me. My tears go unnoticed. And I am alone.

It is then, I am thankful for my words. For this space. For my ability to express myself. When no one hears me, or no one is paying attention… there is still satisfaction in letting my words escape me.

Vanessa xoxo

  1. I experienced the same even throughout adulthood. The good news is I actually reclaimed my self. Not easy though but can be done. Keep on writing and expressing. Huggs and blessings to you :)

  2. I feel the same exact way which is why its always been so important to me to paint and shoot photography,an outlet, sometimes I wanna have my own personal space to share my thoughts through words although I’m no writer, but free writer yes, but I still have the fear of having things flip on me but nevertheless I read your blog and others and still feel like I can relate its good to know when you aren’t alone

  3. I know so many of us that can relate to that. I really believe that something hits an internal “freeze” button in us at a time of the most pain or trauma as a kid. Parents and other adults really need think before doing so many of the things they do to children, under the assumption that they are young enough to forget.


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